The Pain Blog

No More

2010-09-01T18:17:00.000-07:00

Dear God,

How much more can I take. The heart you gave me is breaking for those that are hurting. I cannot live like this much longer.

Let me tell you something...

2009-02-19T12:31:00.000-08:00

Each person is born with a different ability to deal with pain. I have played football in the snow with broken knuckles and my skin split open from the cold. I also have been laying on a gurney(do they still call them that?) before surgery feeling absolutely no pain. 3 shots of fentanyl, 1 of Versed(awesome that is all I have to say about that) and whatever else I got before surgery.

Each person reacts to medications differently also. I do not get the initial high and wobbly feeling of narcotic pills. However if I drink 3 beers I have a buzz, but if I drink hard liquor it takes quite a lot and does not last long. for muscle relaxers I cannot really take flexeril, I seem to have an adverse anger related reaction when taking it. So I use Soma. This does produce a slight floating feeling but that lasts about 2 minutes and then nothing so nothing special there.

Why am I talking about this? I feel that some of my friends think that I am addicted to pain killers. Believe me, the leash that MAPS pain clinic uses for all of their patients is quite short. I have never run out before time and have only asked to up the dose of non-narcotic meds(lyrica...) so please, if you are reading this take note. I do not and have not been addicted to pain killers.

I only ask that you spend a day with one of these types of pains and tell me that you wouldn't take anything.

1. Place a vise on your head and try and do your normal job. Now remember I have had migraines last for weeks, 6 weeks is my record.
2. Hit your dominant foot with a hammer twice an hour all day and night for 2 years, let me know how that works out.
3. Lay on the floor with an un-even rock under one side of your back for about 2 hours. Get up and try and function.

Mean part for those who still don't get it.

You are not me. You have no idea how I feel on a daily basis. If my life is so interesting to you ASK ME. Do not spread rumors do not go to others and say I think our friend John has a medication addiction problem. If you are my friend I am glad that you care enough but I have medical proof that I should have pain. If I wanted to get high I would take the $40 in co-payments I spend on average per week and buy weed, okay?

Sorry, I just can't keep quiet anymore.

Dissapointment

2008-11-03T19:10:00.000-08:00

I have been planning a new phone system for nearly 6 months. I have just found out it has been postponed. This does not sound so bad, however it was scheduled for 11\13. This really sucks.

Tagged

2008-10-31T10:23:00.000-07:00

Here are the rules:
1.Post the rules on your blog
2.Write 6 random things about yourself
3.Tag 6 people at the end of your post
4.If you are tagged, just do it, and pass the tag along!

1. I do not like my hands or anyone else's wet hands.

2. I do not shave with cream or foam. Hot water is it.

3. I ignore people at work who call out my name from a distance instead of coming over to ask me a question

4. I really do like manual labor

5. I often make projects harder then they should be

6. I consider myself lazy

TAGs - Corrie- I am sure everyone else has been hit.

Song in my head

2008-10-29T11:49:00.000-07:00

I cant remember anything
Cant tell if this is true or dream
Deep down inside I feel to scream
This terrible silence stops me

Now that the war is through with me
Im waking up I can not see
That there is not much left of me
Nothing is real but pain now

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please god,wake me

This is the first three stanza's of Metallica's One. It was the first Metallica song I heard that I liked. It still speaks to me. Obviously I have never been in a war but I feel wrung out.

Wrinkled and shrunk
Tired and beaten
writhing and scraping
pushing and drowning
Pain

Are you tired of it too?

2008-08-24T15:58:00.000-07:00

I am so sick of the political bs that flys during an election year. The MSM turns the smallest thing into something that is supposed to be the candidate killer. What is even worse is I read Reddit and Digg - two social media sites- partisian politics is the order of the day. 6 articles about the same thing on the front page of reddit is just ridiculous, digg might be a little better but I have blocked political articles and digg users seem to follow categories better.

Bacon Flavored Cookies

2008-04-07T19:09:00.000-07:00

Overheard at the dinner table"Mommy, cookies"holding up a piece of bacon; "No Leah that is bacon" "No! cookie mommy!" So now I am going to completely throw myself into creating a bacon flavored cookies. I am sure that there is a market out there even if cholesterol rises or bacon supplies dwindle.

On a lighter note

2008-01-15T21:26:00.000-08:00

Sorry for the depressing posts lately.

I was awake earlier then usual and I heard something coming from Leah's room. I walked up and stopped at the door. Leah was singing. Nothing specific, just singing. I went in there and expected to find her ready to sit and watch some 'yardigans(backyardigans). Well she wasn't; she was face down, butt in the air, eyes closed and clutching her blanket. She was asleep. My child sings in her sleep.

Wonderful.

Remembering 2007

2007-12-28T21:14:00.000-08:00

Well I made it through another year. I wonder what 2008 has in store. I can't be anywhere near as painful. So what have I learned?

1. I was right a long time ago about parenting. No one has a clue how to solve everything that their child(ren) do.
2. Doctors have no idea what to do with their patients. They have a playbook and run it until you make it clear that it is either not working or it is not what you want to do.
3. Working at a place that values your input makes up for a lot of budget money.
4. Sites like Digg, reddit... have no real reason to stop people from gaming their sites. If they did I would not see ron pauls name on any of them 5 times a day.
5. My wife is THE best wife in the world. Dealing with me alone is a second full time job but she is so wonderful with Leah I do not know what I would do without her.

Corrie you are beyond any idea of what I thought a wife could be.

JM

A Night To Remember

2007-09-28T13:22:00.000-07:00

Honestly I would rather forget it. I got home a lot earlier from work then usual and waited for Corrie and Leah to come home a few hours later. I am having back spasms again which seem to be worse then I remember them being since I injured it in 1992. I was dialed into work when they got home and I was informed that Leah was sick. I did not think much of it since I had today (Friday) off. I figured Leah and I would get some quality time together. Corrie apparently did not think that me being alone with Leah and not really being able to pick her up would be a good thing so she decided to stay home too. Bummer, Leah and I do not get out of our pajamas all day and I am pretty sure her diet suffers a little; but we have a lot of fun, she watches cartoons I play Battlefield. However she does not understand the nuances of BF2 and the fact that stopping to read a book is not good when you are flying a jet around mountains. Well anyway we planned a couple short family outings to take care of some errands. Well apparently she was more sick then we thought.

At 11:30 pm I got up because she would cry out then not make any noise for about 1/2 hour then repeat. So I snuck into her room and watched her, she was crying out in her sleep. Grumpy about having to get out of bed I went back in and put earplugs in. Well I can still hear most of what goes on in the house with the bedroom door closed, fan on and earplugs in. Last night was no exception. She did it again just as I was drifting off to sleep. I got up, tore the earplugs from my ears and went in to have a discussion with Leah about sleeping at night. I got in there and she was not crying anymore but was trying to breath so hard that her whole body tensed as she took each breath. I picked her up and was going to see if she would take some more decongestant. NOPE. She was having nothing to do with that. Her breathing just was not right so I called the nurseline just to make sure I was not being an over-protective parent. The RN on the other end heard her and said "do you think you can be calm enough to take her into the ER or should I call an ambulance"; this is a sentence I do not want to hear again. Not because she offended me but it hammered home that I was right that something was wrong with my little girl. I told her that we would be leaving soon and I thanked her. I walked straight into our bedroom and flipped on the light.

Corrie does not wake up easy. I find that getting drunks that have passed out awake and out the door much easier then getting her up. We both threw on pretty much whatever we found and went in. We waited for about an hour and got to see why ER Drs are skeptics about non specific injuries. The guy sitting next to Corrie had either a right knee or left knee problem, of which the Dr asked him about right there in the waiting room.

Apparently Leah does not like stethoscopes, she cried every time someone tried to use one. The doctor came in and ordered a nebulizer for her. She liked the first respiratory person that came in and took the treatment well. She reacted very well to the nebulizer and was better for a little while. However an hour later she needed another and again reacted well. They decided to admit her, however we had to wait until 5 am to get to the room.

When we got to the room we were greeted by the night nurse who Leah did not want to let go of! She had to be carried around and they went to get a balloon. We did another treatment and then Leah went to bed. Corrie went to get things from home and I tried to get some rest. The chair in the room was very uncomfortable and the cot that they had in there was just as bad.

Corrie got back and we both tried to sleep. We did not get to see a doctor until 9 am or so. She made it very clear that our doctor does not come into the hospital and that they have a clinic close to our house. No blood tests or any other tests for that matter. We waited around for quite awhile more and were told that we could go home as soon as the home nebulizer was delivered so we were happy when it arrived.

Leah by this time was not willing to be cooped up in that room and was getting into everything. Leah's nurse came in and told us that she was not willing to let her go home yet since she was still having to get treatments every 3 hours, apparently she needs to go 4 hours. So I asked "so if she needs treatment and gets better after each treatment what does it matter if you do it here or we do it at home? " Apparently I was speaking in a different language because she did not understand me.

After one more talk with the respiratory lady we finally convinced the nurse to let us go. We got home put Leah to bed ate and then I waited for someone to finish some work on our house then we all slept for quite awhile.

Leah is doing well she needs to be nebulized a few time a day but other then that is pretty much the same little girl. I hope this does not happen for quite awhile or ever for that matter.

Fishing with a 19 month old

2007-09-08T20:13:00.000-07:00

Corrie and I both like fishing. Matter of fact she is the one that e-mailed me about buying our boat first. On a side note she is the one that initiated our relationship and lets me know about it!

Okay back to fishing with Leah. Leah is about the most patient child I know. But when faced with a new situation and nowhere to go she gets a little stir crazy. Corrie and I talked about what we would do. I hate fishing alone and hate it even more when Corrie is there and not fishing with me. So I asked Corrie if the portable dvd player we got for signing up with satellite tv accepted batteries. When she said yes I knew we had a winning combination. Here is a picture that tells everyone how it went.

My weekend with Leah

2007-09-08T19:58:00.000-07:00

Okay I have spent a couple weekends alone with Leah but not one where she is so mobile and so vocal. We have had 2 outbursts of crying and screaming, ignoring them is hard but I think it works well. She finally comes out of where she is and acts like nothing is wrong. She did the thing where she was not sure if I was still there and stopped crying and came out looked at me then went back in and cried some more. It was very hard not to laugh out loud.

She had a bath tonight and that went well. I let her play, then wet her head down(she hates that) let her play some more then washed her hair(hates this even more) and then I let her play.

Meals have been fun since I am not sure where her plates are so I have washed it over and over again. I think I am going to have to get Corrie to make up a cabinet listing so I can find things.

The Boat

2007-06-15T20:23:00.000-07:00

Okay so apparently I have no idea how to take care of batteries. I have never had this much trouble with any battery I have ever dealt with. I have 4 that are not working. I finally bought a new one for the lawn mower but I charged up two of other batteries up and they tested fine(got a tester from fleet farm) and got over to Eagle lake to take the boat out for a shakedown and guess what? It would not turn over. Shoot me now please.

Small Rant

2007-06-02T18:27:00.000-07:00

I play with my daughter and listen to her giggle and squeal and wonder why my father did not want to play with me. What was so wrong? I know in my head that he is the one that had the problem not me; but when I think about this stuff I feel unbelievably insecure and worthless. I look into my daughter's eye's and see the love and caring that she has for me and wonder what he did not see in me. He always called me disturbed and said I needed mental help from day one.

Leah

2007-05-29T19:52:00.000-07:00

I have become more aware of how much I let go in relation to my day when I watch Leah. Take for example how much time that person in the car in front of you costs you when they do not travel the speed limit or the customer service rep who does not care at all about what has happened to your order.

Now let me explain Leah. She started screaming and bending over at the waist looking into a floor grate. I thought she cut herself or she stubbed her toe but as I got closer I found the problem. A kernel of corn from dinner had slipped out of her hand and plunged deep into the grate. She had the concerned look of a mother whose child was trapped and she could not help. I extracted the piece of corn and palmed it and asked Corrie for another piece of corn so that if she decided to eat it I would not have to shudder in horror. After I gave her the new one was in her hand she was happy and walked away.

Job

2007-05-27T22:01:00.000-07:00

Well I have a NEW job. I was at Wells Fargo for awhile and found it to be very hard to deal with. I tried to get a server reloaded and was told it would take 6 weeks. DUDE! Okay so I talked with Steve S. and he put me on to a job with Microdynamics as their sys admin. I can tell I like it a lot more already with just one day. I walked in and did not feel tense. I hope that I can do some good there.

Views on Vista

2007-05-27T21:47:00.000-07:00

I got a new disk from Alienware with Vista on it. I thought what the heck since I am going to be asked to support it here and at work I should at least use it.

Installation - Funny since Alienware sent me this disk you would think that they would slipstream the drivers into it. Apparently not.

First use - Got used to answering yes and ok to security warnings. Not used to not being able to use my keyboard when coming out of hibernation. Reboot fixes but causes problems. Apparently most anti-virus providers have not solved their problems with MS and do not fully support it.

No real performance issues. Laptop scores a 4.2 out of 5.9 so I was not suprised.

All in all decent OS but needs more work and needs to be more intuitive, I feel like I am going back to NT4 with everything hidden from the user.

2 more weeks

2007-05-11T20:59:00.000-07:00

I have to wear the walking boot for 2 more weeks and it really makes me sad. I want to just walk normally and not have some aparatus strapped to my leg. This is a picture of the x-ray I had taken today. Note that it looks like a deck screw.

Fishing Season Approches

2007-04-29T19:40:00.000-07:00

Well it is almost May and I am thinking about taking my boat out to Eagle Lake for a break in cruise. I got the water off the tarp today to get something done on it. I think it will have to be the first week of may as I am going to get some stuff in may basement done.

Well I changed back to another pain killer. I was falling asleep at work on the new one. After I tried to get off them altogether for two days, I did not have any side effects (stomach cramping, shaking) or anything like that. I did have some severe pain so I talked to my doctor and he was happy that I had tried but based on what was going on in my foot, he was sure it would be a couple more weeks. I probably have to wear the boot for 4 more weeks. Woooohoooo.

Adoption

2007-04-13T11:00:00.000-07:00

So guess what, discovery channel now has "adoption stories". So I am home today and I had to watch it. It reminded me of all the emotions and thoughts I had around adopting Leah.

I realized that when we were going through infertility stuff doors were being closed in front of us all the time; monetary, medical, insurance and many others. When we finally stopped dealing with it and took time off from it we realized that adoption was what we were supposed to be doing. All of a sudden doors opened for us that we never even knew about. We stopped wondering about things it all seemed natural.

A public declaration of my love for my wife

2007-04-12T20:54:00.000-07:00

Corrie is the most beautiful, caring and giving person I have ever met. I cannot imagine life without her. She is the mother of my child and my ultimate love. When I hear people praise their wife I smile because I know what they are feeling. I may not show it often and I know that I owe her more then I can ever repay but I hope that she will let me try.

Recovering

2007-04-12T20:48:00.000-07:00

I made it through surgery and well; it hurts. The surgery went well apparently from what Corrie heard from the doctor. I spent more time in recovery since they expected the surgery to go longer and the spinal did not wear off. I am more mobile now then I was after my shoulder surgery(go figure). The pain was so immense the first day that I could not take it and called the on call doctor. He told me I could take ibuprofen which the nurses in post op said I could not. I called in the next morning and got a different painkiller. While it did not take all of it away at least I could sleep a couple hours at a time and not feel like my foot was on fire.

Settling in

2007-04-03T20:16:00.000-07:00

Well I have been at my new job for a few weeks and I can tell you that it is amazing!!! I wear jeans and a t-shirt. I work on servers that are not anywhere near me and I am okay with it.

I feel I can say some thingsabout what was going on. I broke a bone in November and told my old job that I needed surgery on it. I was told "if you have surgery, we will have to re-think your position here at ******. To say I was a little shocked is an understandment. I chose to keep my job and support my family. However now I can tell you that I should have done the surgery. I am in immense pain constantly now. Surgery is 2 days away and I cannot wait. They are going to insert a screw in my foot and get the bones together. here is a link to the surgery (radiographic so no blood).

http://www.wheelessonline.com/ortho/jones_fracture

Resignation

2007-02-27T16:59:00.000-08:00

Well I resigned last week. It was kind of anti-climatic since I dressed up walked directly to my boss's desk and was prepared to resign. Problem was, he was out sick. So I checked the website to find out what to do. I was supposed to resign to his boss. Awesome! However his boss is an open position right now. : So I then tried the director, she was out sick too. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

I called my boss's cell and left a message to call me. After no call after 11:00 I called the HR guy who finally accepted my resignation. I am not sure but I think no one I know has had this much trouble resigning.

Please pray

2007-02-14T17:55:00.000-08:00

I am going through some difficult times at work. Not the usual. I might not be there soon. I am disappointed, scared and angry. I know that we will be okay for awhile financially but honestly I just hate this.

Tooth Paste

2006-12-27T17:47:00.000-08:00

Corrie and I were in the store a few weeks ago and we talked about starting to brush Leah's teeth. Now normally that is not a real big deal. Get some toothpaste a brush. We decided this in the baby aisle of Target and so I figured that the TP would be there. So I told Corrie to get the TP at the end of the aisle. She looked around and I saw a look of confusion that told me that she could not see it. I went ahead and went back to "show" her where it was. When I got there she said "I can't find it"; so I said "it is right here" and pointed to a tube of paste and saw "Butt Paste" there in large letters. Apparently the TP is in the tooth brush aisle.

Need help

2006-12-27T11:50:00.000-08:00

I need help wanting to adopt every child that I see that needs a home. Which is not horrible but I know that right now introducing a new child into our home would be difficult. Leah is so much fun and I really want to experience her and cultivate a relationship with her.

Scooter

2006-11-20T20:05:00.000-08:00

The last one was so that I could say that I had posted more recently than my wife.

Well my shoulder is healing well but when I thought things were going to start getting easier, I broke my foot. I asked my wife to shoot me and she said NO. I now have a scooter, yes a scooter. Here is a picture. I kneel on it and scoot along. Yes laugh a lot. No there are no pictures of me on it. I am getting a new one tomorrow, it has steering! This one has none and let me tell you lifting the front to turn is not fun. It has a brake but if you know me and understand inertia you will get the point.

2006-11-20T20:01:00.000-08:00

I just updated! Ha Ha I win. CFB is a fussy pants!

Sorry no posting for awhile

2006-10-11T20:39:00.000-07:00

Let the cycle of no sleep begin again! I took my sleeping pill and nothing happened. I know it is a little after 10 but I took it at 8.

Work is going a little better. I have not seen my mgr for 2 days. I did an informational interview with another group and it went very well.

I play a video game called Battlefield 2, while it is fun some of the people have got to relax. It is a game. I have fun, trash talk and all that but, getting upset over someone taking a helicopter? Please, if it getting that intense for you go do something else. BTW the south park episode about world of warcraft, extremely funny. I know a guy at work who plays it and he said it is pretty accurate.

Leah has been sick but it is so funny even when she has snot running out of her nose she wants to laugh and have fun. Amazing. I keep listening to a song by the band Live called Heaven, here is a snip of the lyrics:

You don't need no friends get back your faith again you have the power to believe another dissident take back your evidence it has no power to deceive

I'll believe it when I see it, for myself

I don't need no one to tell me about heaven I look at my daughter, and I believe I don't need no proof when it comes to God and truth I can see the sunset and I perceive

I sit with them all night everything they say is right but in the morning they were wrong I'll be right by your side come hell or water high down any road you choose to roam

I know that God gave her to us to live and care for but I just can't believe how perceptive she is. I was upset today and she was sitting in my lap and she looked at me and smiled then patted my stomach and snuggled. This is not the first time that she has done this. I guess we are going to be an emotional family. Even the dog can tell when something is wrong.

Well here it is

2006-08-16T21:09:00.000-07:00

So for the last few weeks I have been secretly worrying about Leah's adoption. I have dreams where I physically destroy people that try and take her. I see her inquisitive face looking over someone else's shoulder and the only things I can do is sing "you are my sunshine" as she walks away.

There are no indications that things are wrong that we know about. It is just stressful.

My wife

2006-08-14T18:43:00.000-07:00

My wife posted on her blog last week about me. I cannot begin to describe how this made me feel. She is such a wonderful person that I cannot begin to describe what she means to me. I consider myself extremely blessed to have her in my life. I do not know how I would have dealt with some of the medical problems that I have had in my life. She is so patient and sometimes I cannot believe that she continues to be the wife and mother that she is.

I love her with all my heart, soul and being. I Love You Fussy!

work 2

2006-08-14T18:39:00.000-07:00

Okay so work has settled down but I am still not happy. I find myself doing the absolute least to seem like I am doing something. This bothers me as my work ethic is definately non-existant. I wonder if my boss can tell that I am doing this or not. I hope that I can turn this around starting tommorow.

Work

2006-07-27T21:04:00.000-07:00

Okay so I have had an emotional 2 weeks. I do not feel that I am receiving the recognition that I deserve at my job. I know I should be worried about something so trivial. However I spend about a 1/3 of my day working so it is a big part of my life. That being said I have been thinking about why this is so important to me. I know that I could look at it as a ways to an end and deal with it that way. However I am not like that, I really believe in the things I get involved in. Case in point, if someone were to make disparaging comments about my church, I would get angry. I would because I take ownership. Now I have worked there for about 9 years, and this is not the first time this has happened and I am sure that it will not be the last. What I do know is the comment my boss (who I like) made is the problem. "well, you work in a support role and the people in this group do not see all the good things that you are doing they just remember when something did not work". What the..., I asked him "how is that fair". I should have gone on to point out that each release when installed at a store creates a problem that requires a fix for that program or a update for another.

What has become clear to me over the last few hours is this; why am I looking for validation from a job? I know that sounds simplistic and trite, but really, how much does this job matter in the grand scheme of things. I know that I spend a 1/3 of my day there but why do I spend that much time there? To provide for my loving and caring wife, for my child who is so beautiful, and to support my church who is doing God's work here in Minneapolis. That is it. Sure it is fun when my boss tells me that I should spend the budget, who wouldn't want to order 80 workstations at a time?

Clearly I have to focus on the things that matter and maybe this is God's way of saying, you are done there, I have something so much better in mind for you.

movie time

2006-07-22T12:38:00.000-07:00

Last night my wife and I went to the movie at church, we saw Narnia. I was a good time to just sit and watch a movie with friends. I am glad though that the pastor turned on the air conditioning. It was about 80 degrees in there. Not much else other then there is a weird guy that showed up and proceeded to stare at all the women that were there.

2006-07-20T21:09:00.000-07:00

This is my beautiful daughter. We are in the process of adopting her. I cannot tell you how much I love her and cannot live without her.

Must update more

2006-07-20T20:57:00.000-07:00

Okay since my last post I have had surgery on my shoulder and find that typing is not something I could do very well until now. So I think that I will start including a "What has this experience taught me" segment to each post that talks about an experience.

Shoulder surgery - What has this taught me

1. Anesthesia mixed with Fentanyl(they gave it to me), and a nerve block on my right arm are all good

2. All doctors are not the same but until a relationship is established they do not trust you to tell them the truth. Must be part of medical training

3. Learn to do things with the other arm. I cannot tell you how frustrating trips to the bathroom and eating are.

4. If you do not have a support system to help you for about 2 weeks you are screwed. My wife was there above and beyond the call (not with the bathroom thing) so many times.

5. Stay out of work for 2 weeks even if you are a computer nerd like me. Slowly during the second week start using your computer 1 to 3 hours a day.

6. Learn how to ask for help and be gracious when it is offered.

7. For about 5 to 6 weeks do not try to play battlefield 2. Trust me or your new friend will be ice and painkillers.

8. Learn how to sleep upright or in different positions. I sleep about 3 hours average a night because I did not do this.

9. Curb eating. I am not gaining weight but I am losing any tone that I had in my body. I am in shape for those that know me. ROUND IS A SHAPE! :)

10. For the special people that have helped you find a way to thank them that shows your love for them.

National Anthem

2006-05-02T09:53:00.000-07:00

Okay I know that it has been awhile since I posted. New baby, gutted basement and work have all taken toll on time.

Even if no one reads this I at least have said something.

WHO CARES if someone wants to make a version of our national anthem in another language? Does it hurt something? Do I believe that if you would like to live here in the United States you should learn English or at least some English? YES. Imagine if I worked at a company that had a diverse population(I do btw) how would we get anything done if we all spoke our native language or had to have one or more interpreter per meeting. Nothing would get done on time. Is it okay that when I walk past a conversation in the hall that I do not understand it, yeah it is. If I have requirements for a project that do not make absolute sense for someone from another country then by all means find a way to understand it and get the work done.

That being said. Please do not make mountains out of molehills, find a common ground and become a citizen if you would like to live/work here.

Finally a doctor that reacts!

2006-01-09T16:21:00.000-08:00

I went to the doctor today! Usually this meets with anger, frustration and lack of action. She listened, asked questions, and formed a plan of action. She gave me something to put me to sleep so that I can finally get this thing under control.

First day - Sleepless in Minneapolis

2006-01-07T22:06:00.000-08:00

Well I thought I would try this so that at least when I am not sleeping I could just ramble on, not for attention but just for fun.

I have had a migraine for about 5.5 weeks now. Yes I know this is rare but it has happened before. I have sought medical attention and have an appt on Monday. I think I am going to try to write down all of the medications that I have been put on for these things for the last 3 years.

Vicodin
Vicoprofen
Darvocet
Firocet
Imitrex - shots and pills
Demerol
Valium
Thorazine
amitryptiline (sp?)
another anti-depressant that I can't remember
A blood pressure med that I can't remember

Treaments
acupuncture
massage - great but I had to pay for it myself
chiropratic
imaging therapy - where I try to imagine the loosening of the muscles and the pain going away (works for about 5 minutes while I am doing it)
yoga music
relaxation
weight loss (120lbs)

I will add more to those as I remember.

That is it for tonight.